i am developing into the kind of person i always wanted to be, but was always too scared to be. i'm not so scared of life anymore. i don't worry about pointless things. i don't find value in money or material possestions. i find happiness in the people that i care about. i believe that everything happens for a reason. everything you go through is a lesson, so learn from it. i've learned that feelings that were never addressed come back to bite you in the ass in the parking lot at the end in chris martin's car. and i've learned that egotism is highly overrated. a humble man is something i long to find.

i know what i want out of life. i want to get out of this town. i want to go to college. and hopefully one day law school. i want to enjoy everyday. and be a thankful, appreciative person.

i realize that love cannot be forced. love just happens. it takes time, as well. it is a mutual thing. it doesn't come after three weeks. you don't just fall in love with everyone you date. love is selective. love is picky. love is amazing, if it is indeed, love.

i long to wake and find that my life is perfect. but it won't happen if i don't make it happen. carpe diem.